I truly don't know why, after being a Christian most of my life, I am still amazed by the depth of my Savior's love for me.
Last night I came home from an event where I had books available for purchase. I had been really excited about this one because it was at my school, in conjunction with a "family reading" focus. I was offering book sales as a fund raiser for the school. I had advertised it with my friends, colleagues, newsletter, FB, etc. I even had a t-shirt printed up and made out order forms if "fans" wanted one for themselves. I just knew this was going to be a fantastic event!
I didn't sell a single book.
So, I was rather disheartened to say the least, once I got home. As I sat moping, thinking things I shouldn't have been thinking...("I can't believe soandso didn't buy a book", "I must have been in a bad location", "Well that was a disaster"...you get the point)...I pulled out my iPod and began just flipping through wallpapers. I kid you not, as I was scanning, one wallpaper appeared with the verse that states, "and the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:7.
I stopped in my tracks! Right then, I prayed and asked for that peace, and was thankful for the reminder that whatever I was going through (even something as minor as my feelings being hurt), God had the ability to give me peace.
Then I continued with my scanning, saving pictures I liked. Again, in the midst of nature scenes and goofy cartoon characters, another wallpaper popped up. It was a rock with these words engraved on it: "You are loved". God wasn't through speaking to me! Not only did he offer me his peace, but he reminded me of his love.
OK. I went to bed that night asking forgiveness for my pity party, and asking for strength to seek out his will with these events in the future.
The next morning, I awoke with that same emptiness...not really wanting to come to school and face people with the fact that I had not sold one book at the event we were all working hard at! A sad admission after the amazing gift God had given me just the night before!
Now I don't know about your mornings, but in my house, we have morning rituals down to the second. There is usually no spare time from the minute I get out of bed until the time I am trying to get my teenage daughter out the door. Somehow this morning, I managed to sit down for a few minutes and had time to pray...asking God again to help me with his strength, his purpose, his love.
Guess what?
We were driving to school and one of my favorite songs started playing: "He Knows My Name"! The God of the universe, the master of all creation, the One who reached through sin and death to save me, KNOWS me! And He loves me so much; he cares about my feelings so deeply; he knows my weaknesses and my needs to such a degree; that he would take time and effort to show me over and OVER again how much he cares.
How gracious is our Lord.
I believe every turn in our life has its ups and downs. The "ups" are so we can be thankful. The "downs" are so we know who to be thankful to.
ReplyDeleteI am so excited about what you have accomplished. Hang in there! All in God's timing, my dear friend.
Love ya!